We all have insecurities. Some we’re aware of, some have built up over the years without us even realizing it. Maybe it’s the wounds from childhood, the sting of a first heartbreak, or the pain of losing people we once held close. Whatever the reason, at some point, we begin to feel like we’re not enough. We convince ourselves that we don’t deserve the things we truly need. And so, we start pulling away.
For me, I don’t let people get too close. I hate the idea of them leaving, of ending up empty once again. It took me a long time to accept that losing people is just part of life. The ones who truly want to stay will stay. But the problem is, we focus so much on those who left us broken, instead of the ones who chose to stay.
And that’s just one example. Many of us grow up hearing things like, “If you don’t do this, Mom/Dad won’t love you.” Somewhere deep down, we begin to believe that love has to be earned. That we must prove ourselves to be worthy of it. This pattern is dangerous. Because unless we break it, we’ll keep giving so much of ourselves, hoping to be loved in return, only to feel empty when it doesn’t come the way we expected.
The first step is recognizing the pattern. What’s your insecurity? For me, it’s the fear of losing people. For others, it might be the fear of being judged, leading them to do things they don’t even like just to fit in. Some fear failure so much that they don’t even try. Others feel insecure about their appearance and let that define their worth. Accepting that we all have insecurities isn’t weakness — it’s the first step toward self-love. It means you see yourself completely, flaws and all, and you’re willing to work on them.
And as you do, you start uncovering a new version of yourself — one that is stronger, kinder, more resilient, and full of potential.
This reminds me of a mistake I used to make. I kept longing for the old me — the one full of energy and positivity. For the longest time, I thought my goal should be to get that version of myself back. But then I realized something: that version of me is gone. It’s the past. And I was wasting my time trying to resurrect it.
Instead of chasing who I used to be, I should focus on building someone even better. The old me had its time. Now, it’s time for a new me — stronger, wiser, and ready to grow.